-Princess May Xnocens -Queen September Xnocens -Mechta October, May's handmaiden -Rhett October, Mechta's husband -Mechta's ogres, about 7 to 9 (3 to 12 with minor tweaks to the script) -Other ogres, at least 3 -July -Borne -Idius March
The ruin-builders: -January, the leader (looks similar to April) -November Y. P. Day, rough block carver -February, figure carver
The snake river kids: -April (looks similar to January, has light brown hair and wears a light green shirt) -Kid 1 -Kid 2 -Kid 3
Other bit parts: -person from crowd -cure-all catcher -Young September -Friend of young September -Nurse -two other companions of May's -Teacher -Desk Person at archives
Kids are walking through the woods. Kid 1 is in the middle of a story.
Kid 1: ...but they planned it so if you headed straight for the place without studying the map you'd run into what was practically a cliff. Kid 2: So you deliberately went there to see if you could climb it anyway. Kid 1: No. Kid 3: Look, Snake River!
Snake River is rather shallow and has a bottom of smooth slabs of rock. Kids start to cross Snake River. April trips and slides down Snake River like it's a water slide until she gets to a place where the terrain goes up and the river is carried over the hill by three Archimedes screws. She looks to her right and sees oddly new looking blocks of rock with relief things portraying parts of the life of some guy in a Vader-esque helmet. April climbs over hill, sees folks making blocks, drawing up designs, etc.
April walks up to February, who is making blocks.
April: Are you making ruins? February: Yep, we're exercising our most important right. April: The right to play? February: No... April: Religion! February: No, the right to think. This figure represents Idius March.
The ruin-builders are performing a play on the life of Idius March which is based on Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar. For the SFX they use holographic weapons. The Snake River kids are in the audience.
January is backstage wearing Idius March's costume but with the helmet off. She is covering the area directly under her neck with her hand and generally acting like she doesn't feel well.
February: Are you OK? January: Yes, I just feel a bit weird from the holographic weapon. November: Holographic weapons shouldn't do that.
November sticks a holographic weapon through his arm to demonstrate what they should do: fade out before touching your body.
January: Well, mine didn't fade like that. It...let's see if it'll do it again.
January sticks a holographic dagger through her hand. It doesn't fade and leaves a scar.
January: Mine did that. February: Uh-oh, I'll go get the cure-all. November (as February is applying the cure-all): I wonder what made it do that.
The river kids are saying “bye” at crossroads in a neighborhood of row houses after dark. Kids 1 and 2 go one way and kid 3 and April another way. The camera follows kids 1 and 2 who walk half a block and are about to walk up to a house when they see a partially mummified giant snail coming at them.
Kid 2: A mummy snail. Kid 1 grabs Kid 2. Kid 1: Unlocking the door will take too long, let's walk around the block to put more distance between us and it. They proceed to do just that.
Kid 2: If someone would unzip the pocket your keys are in, would you notice? Kid 1: What, you want to steal my keys? Awkward silence Kid 2: Yep. Kid 1 unzips pocket and hands Kid 2 their keys. Kid 1: Here, you can have them. Kid 2 (somewhat nervously): No, you can have them.
Kid 2 hands the keys back. Kid 1 rolls eyes, they walk up to house, kid 1 unlocks door, they get inside.
Ogres are talking in foreground. February is walking by in background but is looking at ogres and is more in focus.
Ogre: The girl we're looking for is -gestures- this tall, has light brown hair and wears a light green shirt.
Cut to Jan walking up to April and handing her a beige trench coat, platform shoes and a purple hat.
January: Put these on. April: Why? Jan: Just do.
Jan: There are evil ogres after you.
April is compliant.
Jan is showing the river kids around a mansion. It looks weird and deserted, but is actually one of her team's earlier projects.
Jan: ...and here are the bedrooms. Don't use the one on the way right, we broke the bed in a way that makes dangerous metal bits stick through it. Kid 3 (looking in closet): Why are all the clothes green and black? Jan: Because the previous owners were eccentric, but really because we had a lot of green and black fabric.
November is trying to get info from archive or other place with information which required an I.D.
Desk Person: Name, I.D. and purpose please. November: Shows passport. I'm November Day, I'm looking for information on laser weapons. Desk Person hands November a large book. November looks at the index, looks up and reads a single page towards the middle and hands the book back to Desk Person. November: Thank you. November walks off.
February shows the kids a picture of the turquoise dagger.
February: This is what Idius's dagger really looked like. It's magical, when someone gets stabbed by it whatever happens to them next is an illusion. They become trapped, but they also become way stronger. A few years ago it showed up again in the strange happenings surrounding princess May Xnocens's wedding.
Princess Xnocens is walking through the streets of some place with Quaraqi architecture singing about something weird. She is directly followed by her Mexican-Greek handmaiden Mechta who is prettier than her and a bunch of other people to their sides who receive less focus than them. Suddenly July shows up and wounds princess Xnocens. Borne runs up to help her, but July threatens him with his pointy shoes. Borne jams his toes between July's heel and the rest of July's shoe and flicks July's shoe off. Borne then runs over to princess May Xnocens.
Borne: Are you all right?
May shakes her head and shows where she was hurt. Borne tries to pick her up, but she cries out in pain so he puts her down again.
Borne: Does anybody have anything we can carry her on? Person in crowd: Sorry, no. Borne: OK, you look after her while I bring the medicine over here.
Borne runs off.
We hear Queen September think that ogres are always evil. She then demonstrates with a cat how to get into the castle with a one-way revolving door like the ones in zoo's.
Q. S. (to herself, looking at ogres): They're taller than the cat, so the bar which isn't visible from here will redirect them into the jail.
Mechta appears out of nowhere and shows ogres how to jump over the bar.
Mechta (to Queen): I don't think ogres are born evil, they just don't like you because you keep throwing them in jail. (to ogres, who seem to accept her as their leader): OK, this is a mission takeover! While you're looking through the castle, see if you can find my husband. Now I suggest you three go there and up the stairs to look through the attic, the two of you look through the pantry there, and the rest of you come with me and go to the hall and the library.
They all go in the direction Mechta suggested
Ogre: I found someone!
Mechta runs over. Ogre found large ugly pig with wings in a chest.
Mechta: Yes, that's him, but he's under a spell.
Borne is in the same room as and walking towards a bottle of cure-all. July appears behind him and holds either a knife or the point of one of his shoes to Borne's neck. Borne stops. July: Take one more step in that direction and I'll kill you. Borne: Then I guess you're going to kill me. Borne starts walking and so does July, who keeps his weapon in exactly the same place relative to Borne's neck. July: Princess May was off to marry a man she doesn't love. Borne: I doubt she'd prefer to be dead. July: Their union will release Idius March, who will massacre the ogres. Borne: Nothing makes it OK to try to kill semi-innocent people.
Borne picks up jar of cure-all and throws it to some random person standing in the doorway on the other side of the room who runs off. July looks back and forth between Borne and running person, then runs after running person without harming Borne.
Mechta and her ogres are running around happily. Cut to them planting apple seeds. Mechta: We are planting apple seeds. Ogres: We are planting apple seeds. Mechta: They are going to grow to trees. Ogres: They are going to grow to trees. Mechta: Juicy apples we can eat. Ogres: Juicy apples we can eat. Mechta: Or trade them for gold and meat. Ogres: Or trade them for gold and meat.
Borne: July said you marrying would release Idius March May: You shouldn't believe... Borne: I don't, but is there any way to check just in case? May: Well, my mother would know, but she helped arrange this marriage.
May Xnocens walks through a doorway. Borne turns around and sees July, then runs to the doorway, locks door with himself outside, and shoves the key under the door.
July: You should be on that side. Stopping her. Borne: I should be on whichever side stopping you. July: Who gave you that idea? Borne: You did, when you tried to kill her! July: What I meant was...not that.
July starts to walk away, then turns to look back.
July: You'll be sorry soon enough!
One of Mechta's ogres is admiring a shoe, then puts it on. Zoom out to the rest of Mechta's ogres, who are groomed and well-dressed, forming a circle around Mechta's husband Rhett and waving Greek-Mexican things at him.
Cut to May walking into a room and joining two men standing in the standard priest and groom formation to make the standard priest and couple formation. No-one is wearing the clothes typical of their role, though they are all dressed formally. Priest guy starts to pick up book. Room is not big.
Cut to Rhett transforming into a handsome blonde guy (he gets to keep the wings) and him and Mechta embracing.
Queen September is looking at the necklace she's wearing in a flashback-will-ensue way. It does. In the flashback young September is running through a library with bizarre architecture, then walks through a door and ends up at a place with metal bars like they have in stadiums or use in scaffolding. There's a nurse there, as well as other people.
September: Where am I? Nurse: Come along now, what's your name? September: September Xnocens. I'm with Miss Fourth’s class at the library. Nurse: Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you were one of my patients. Go through that door and take two lefts and a right and you'll get to where I think you want to go.
More trippy library architecture, then September looks into an oval room where “Madeline's classmate” type girl is sitting at a table in the middle drawing demon-like things. She quickly puts her drawings away and the two join other “Madeline's classmate” type girls in the area.
The Octobers are standing together happily when the sky suddenly turns dark and the wind starts blowing. A glowing tornado thing starts at Rhett and moves across the dark sky before materializing into a giant Idius March.
Princess May Xnocens is standing in front of a hotel and sees the sky getting darker. May: Oh no... May runs into the hotel and into a room with a balcony. There are two people in the room who act like they're with her. May: Pack your bags, we need to get out of here! They all start packing, including May. May: Where's Mechta? Other person: She left a few days ago. May: Good.
May grabs her bags and leaves the room to find the hallway crowded. After failing to reach the stairs or the down-escalators through the crowd she slides down the bit between the escalators and reunites with the people from her room outside.
July is holding his hands over what is turning into a mummy snail.
July (chanting): Politics, religion, whether the first Full Metal Alchemist anime is better than the manga. Politics, religion, whether the first Full Metal Alchemist anime is better than the manga. Politics...
Borne walks in. July sees him and stops chanting.
July: You here to stop me? Borne: No, you were right. Idius March was released.
Borne throws turquoise dagger at July's feet. July looks at dagger, then at Borne.
July: I'm not letting you off that easily. Kicks dagger back at Borne. You're going to stop Idius March.
Idius March: I will remove all ogres from this world! Ogre (dressed like the ones who follow Mechta, with similarly dressed ogres standing behind her/him): OK, then kill us. Idius March: No, I'm not going to anything you want, that'd be stupid.
Idius March walks off, while the ogres rejoice at being alive.
Idius March is walking through Qaraqi city.
Borne: Stop! Idius: No. Borne: Anybody got a plan? Or even some vague idea of how he can be stopped? Rhett: I do.
Rhett flies around Idius holding a rope, tying Idius up. Idius breaks the ropes and looks at Rhett, who is still flying.
Idius (thinking voice over): I normally wouldn't want to get on the bad side of someone with wings, but he just tied me up so maybe I already am on his bad side. And I'm more powerful, now, so maybe it couldn't hurt to take a swipe at him.
Rhett flies off, rendering the point moot.
Idius March smashes empty deserted house. Borne runs up and attempts to climb Idius's leg. Idius picks Borne up and puts him down on the ground, then picks up rock and is about to crush Borne with it when either Mechta or one of her ogres grabs him by the arm and pulls him into a safe pocket of rubble. Idius doesn't see this and slams the ground with the rock.
Idius: That'll teach him.
We see Idius stepping over the house from Borne's perspective. Borne comes out of the rubble pocket, grabs a sword and tries to hit Idius with it. It has no effect.
Idius March walks into an empty market place. Borne is looking at holographic sword which is less advanced than those of the ruin-builders.
July (from shadows): Just try it.
Borne waves holographic sword over his hand. It does the usual fading out thing.
July: No, on him. Gestures to Idius.
Borne successfully defeats Idius with holographic sword.
Borne (sorta deadpan while looking at his hand): I just killed someone with this hand.
May: Mother! Queen: May! May: Is Mechta here? Queen: No, she ran off with some ogres and a large winged pig. May: What! Person who was with May at hotel: Hideous March... May: Idius March. Hotel person: Idius March was released. May: And some guy knew about it and attacked me with his shoe. Can I get a divorce? Queen: I suppose, but that's not going to help any of those things.
They're in the place where July was chanting at the snail. Borne has a mechanical right hand.
July: Did you really think I was keeping you alive for any reason other than that you were useful to me? Borne: I really believed trying to understand you was a lost cause. Considering what you tried to do to princess Xnocens... July: Ogres!
July's ogres show up and grab Borne by the arms and legs.
Borne: You have ogres? July: take him away!
July's ogres throw Borne off a cliff. While falling, Borne gets the turquoise dagger out of his right pocket with his left hand.
Kid 3: Then what happened? February: Borne stabbed himself with the dagger and... January: Feb! February: Yes? January: I'd hate to have to say this, but get back to work.
November shows up and pulls January aside.
November: Hey, Jan! I found out the hologram sword hurt you because you have someone sealed inside of you. Kid 2: When is it safe for us to go home? Feb: Now, probably.
River kids are walking through vines.
Kid 3: If you get one of these on your hand you get August's disease.
April sees a bit of vine on her hand and flicks it off.
April: What if you get a bit of it on your hand but don't let it stay on your hand for more than a few seconds? Kid 1: If you do that it supposedly means you have a pure soul.
Kid 1: You'll be fine. Evil ogre 1: There she is!
Other kids hide April under vines. Ogre walks over to the kids.
Ogre 1: It's hard to find someone we don't know hidden among people her size. Raises arm against a kid. Ogre 2: Or maybe you saw it wrong and she isn't here.
Ogre 1 lowers arm.
Ogre 3: The boss won't want us attracting attention to ourselves.
River kids are walking through school. April is covered in vines.
Kid 1: Actually I think they're less likely to come at us if you ditch the vines.
April throws off vines. The kids sit down and start eating sandwiches. A teacher walks up to them.
Teacher: April, could you help me get glitter from the storage place? April: OK.
April gets up.
Teacher: Thanks for the help. April: You’re welcome.
April walks off, then sees ogre and runs into bathroom stall. Ogres also walk into bathroom place but don't look in stall.
Ogre: I know the key is in here, just as she acted in the play. April (thinking): Maybe if I get caught and explain I wasn't in the play they'll leave me alone.
April runs out, gets caught and is brought before July who has graying hair.
Ogre: Here is the key, who acted in the play.
April opens her mouth to speak, but discovers she suddenly lost the ability to do so. Suddenly Mechta's ogres come barging in.
Ogre of Mechta's: Fellow ogres! You serve someone wealthier than the Octobers, who we serve, yet we are happier and have nicer clothes. Haven't you ever stopped to think about this?
July's ogres defect to Mechta's side.
Mechta: Let's take you home, little girl. April: Thanks.
They start to walk off with their backs to the camera.